you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Dude, nobody just eats a banana these days. This chick wanted it. She wanted to get down with Charlie Brown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may now shotgun with the bride
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
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