Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
You told my mother that her salad dressing tasted like semen.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Randomize
