what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
I just want to nap all the time and eat Chinese food.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
