Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
accomplished twins. life is a go
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
She's thinkin about havin beer pong at her reception... She's walkin a fine line between trashy and the best idea ever
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
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