He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
Lady GaGa only went backwards in convincing me she's not a man at the VMAs.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize