Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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