my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
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