question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
Dong worry about me. I just cashed bottle of wine when I found out he was in town, I'm being dramatic. I'll text you tomorrow when I'm sober and my face stops bleeding
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
Randomize
