There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize