can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
i am breaking up with you. because you wash your hair too much and you only drink light beer and because you're not party enough.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
