This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
