Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
nutella sex= disaster
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
We are bad people. This is why we are friends. <3
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