Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
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