All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
He's gone. He left a note but all it says is "Dear Neil" followed by a drawing of a hand flipping the bird in the direction of a butt.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
