kristin has been a bad kristin
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
this is a preemptive text before you call me freaking out: i have your keys and your car is parked safely a block down from your apartment.
you are a goddess
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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