I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
Randomize
