I would go down on you faster than GM stock
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
The adults are the big ones right?
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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