'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
i just used shampoo as lube. why? because i'm worth it.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
did i walk over a car last night?
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
i love when the champions come out to play im bringin the shock collar this weekend
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
