will power is for people who don't want to get laid
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
