Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Randomize
