Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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