My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
