Don't you send me to vm
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
no you cant smoke seaweed
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
