You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
