I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
Randomize
