sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
