You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
There are bruises on the top of my foot. The pole won.
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
