He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
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How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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