know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
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