I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Everything about him screamed your future.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
