Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
