Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
