CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
Randomize
