Sry I called you an 8
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
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