I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
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