Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
I woke up at 11 this morning in my car parked in front of the bar.
I know, I tried to wake you up, but I couldnt. So I walked home
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
Randomize
