HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
