FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Randomize
