In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
By the way when you were super fucked up last night, you ate cat food and tried to tell me it was healthy for you
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Randomize
