U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
