therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
you will always have a special place in my vag
there was this guy running across campus barefoot in the pouring rain stepping in all the puddles. i want his life. and i want to be stripper.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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