she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Randomize
