it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
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