i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
so let's talk penis.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
Who the fuck puts glitter on their vagina? It’s all over my face and crotch.
Randomize