Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
We were in his kitchen and she turned to me with a straight face and an avocado in her hand and said "Can we steal this?"
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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