im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
As a female I reserve the right to put my ipod in my cleavage because I have no pockets and not get judged by other girls right??
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
Sometimes while peeing I'll go hands free, put my arms up by my chest and make claw hands, and pretend I'm a new type of dinosaur called Dickosaurus Rex.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize