If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize
