Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I swear it's like I have a jerk off quota I have to meet each week. If I miss three days I have a wet dream and it's like a wasted jizz, and it gets everywhereeeeeee.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
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