Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Also: I hate her so much. She's out at hooters, making spelling errors, while I'm literally sitting at a clinic getting std tested. Which of us won the morality award in this break up.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
Randomize
