I think my fart just growled at me.
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
My parents heard a lamp fall and crash and the dogs were barking like crazy so my mom got up to check. she found you peeing in a corner by the tv. And you kept shhhing her.
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