ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
you were almost asleep and mumbling "your penis is on my cheek"
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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